Monday, March 19, 2012

...Here We Are...

It's been silent on the blog front for the past little while. I finally got to the point (back in February) where I realized that even with all my retroactive blogging, there was no catching up. We were just having too much fun to keep up with. And even more importantly, I also realized that maybe it doesn't really matter. Although I still love the idea of this blog as a holder of memories, and while I think it's important to be able to share our life with those we love who are far away, and to record our happenings for our own sake...maybe it's not the most important thing. It doesn't really matter if I get every single cute photo uploaded. Every person I know does not need to see every wonderful thing my kids are doing. It's not that important if my words are carefully chosen, witty and intelligent. It's not the end of the world if I miss blogging about something fun that happened.

I guess what it comes down to..I've had a real change of perspective regarding the way I spend my time. I realized that while this blog can be a great blessing, it can also (like many other things!) be a curse! And (if I let it...) a big fat time waster! I can justify it all I want, and think of it as "work", but the fact remains that any time that I'm devoting to this blog, selecting and uploading pictures, carefully choosing my words, writing and time that I'm not spending somewhere else! And, let's face it! As far as priorities go (at least in comparison with things like being a good Mom, a good wife, a good friend and a good person), being "a good blogger" is really pretty low. Even when compared with other hobbies, (say...baking, sewing, crafting, photography, reading, running...) blogging is not "the one thing" that I really want to devote my time to honing. I've never cared much about comments or followers, and truly, this blog has never been for the sake of the general public. But somehow, it still became something I was catering to. So I've tried really hard over the past several weeks to live life in the present, and enjoy the moments for what they are, and not what they might look like on camera. I've even purposely left my camera at home on occasion (and if you know know that is a huge step!) in an attempt to not concern myself with capturing (or manufacturing?) just the right moment for the sake of the blog or the"memory". Because sometimes, as much as I hate to admit it, our life looks a lot better in the photos than it did in reality. And that is something I'd like to change.

So this month: I've been making things, instead of just pinning them. Talking to friends instead of facebook stalking them. Walking, running, working and playing instead of spending my time sitting at the computer. Concentrating on cleaning our house instead of cleaning out our photo folders. Focusing on the lives of people that matter to me rather than reading about the lives of people I barely know. Concentrating on enjoying life instead of just documenting it. And it's felt really good. Don't get me wrong! I don't think any of those things are bad, and there's no judging here, man! But for me, it was time to make some changes! And this was where it had to start. Ya know?